The Path to Change

    While I was enjoying my last couple days with E before leaving him and the circus to finish my journey around the United States, I spent some time soaking up the natural beauty of southwest-central Arkansas. I discovered DeGrey Lake State Park and pitched up the tent—my own, not the circus tents this time. One afternoon I noticed there were mountain biking trails, so of course I jumped at the opportunity to get back on my beloved bicycle. In hindsight I probably should have paid more attention to the difficulty levels and distances though. The trail I took was “intermediate” difficulty with steep hills, sharp turns, and some very rocky terrain. Not pebbles or stones—rocks.  (Pictures below show the most leisurely stretch.) It was the most difficult trail I’ve ever biked on. During the 6 mile ride I fell off, stopped to repair parts, got off to walk/push, and cursed out loud… each several times. By the end, I was out of water and covered in blood, sweat, and tears.

 It was the best bike riding experience I’ve had in a long time.  

    A lot of mind-wandering happens on my bike rides. I work through problems, contemplate my existence, and reevaluate the path I’m on (both literally and figuratively). The treacherous trail I subjected myself to was serendipitously named “Iron Mountain.” I could compare the entire experience to life in general. I always say life is a rollercoaster, life is disastrous and beautiful; that day I decided life is also like biking. You can choose your difficulty; sometimes you just want an easy trail, but other times the most difficult path yields the most satisfaction. During the difficult and painful times, it felt like I was never going to get a break. I hated slowing down to walk at times but I knew I wouldn’t make it to the end if I didn’t. The times I fell, I immediately got back up and dusted myself off.  Even fixing my derailleur and shifters caused me great annoyance and displeasure, but maintenance is all part of the process. All of that was worth it. There were lovely times where I would leisurely coast through a flat stretch of dirt between the beautiful autumn trees, or conquer a hill only to relish in the adrenaline and thrill of flying down the other side. When arrived back at the start I felt triumphant; I had great respect for myself and the trail.

    It was on Iron Mountain that my drive to “move mountains” became more of a drive to “move some mountains but don’t break your back doing it; stop to let yourself and others climb them from time to time.” I won’t stop living a life of service and purpose but as I continue this journey around the States, I’m becoming more and more aware that if I made all the roads easy for everyone, no one would have the satisfaction of conquering their own mountains. Some mountains still need to be moved; climate change is real and our Mother Earth is sick. Moving the biggest boulders with the help of others is really the key to the cure. I’ve been contemplating ways to help and support engineers and politicians—the mountain-movers who have the most power—who are on the frontlines of this battle to keep the earth healthy, keeping in mind that “if we don’t nurture nature, we’re just wrecking our own future.” (Thanks, Wookiefoot.) Also keeping in mind that we have other humans who've turned their focus to space exploration and inhabiting other ‘earths’.  What an incredible time to be alive. Life sure is disastrous and beautiful.

    In other news, I made it to Texas! I visited my father this weekend, explored the ocean and state park and soaked up some family love and nourishing food. My journey west shall continue tomorrow, and soon I will be among dozens of familiar faces in Colorado for my dear big sister’s wedding. It’s crazy to think that I’ve been on the road for more than 4 months. I left with $1500 in my pocket and have made it 7,000 miles on hard work, the goodness of people, dumb luck, and love. I don’t really miss “home” the way I did a couple months ago; I’ve discovered that home really is where my heart is… and it follows me wherever I go.

Iron Mountain Trail

Feels so good to step up the difficulty.

Autumn makes me happy

Trail map. I took the green trail (and hiked up to the dam)

Worth every bruise, scrape, and strain.

What more do you need?

DeGrey Lake, you sure are beautiful

Especially at night!

(No caption needed)

Made it to the Gulf of Mexico

Dad and I on the pier

Got to visit a NASA center
"Ground control to Major Tom..."
"Houston, we have a problem..."
etc, etc. 

Look! In the future, I see: Cleaner, more sustainable machinery

Cute little armadillo! I think I kiiiinda like Texas

"You can take this seed and smash it open and still you never find the oak tree hiding inside."

Remember, troubled minds: if you’re going through hell, don’t stop. Keep climbing that mountain, because what goes up must come down.  Peace and love to you all.